I've always been told that it's not good to run away from you problems. I understand that isn't the solution to every problem, and it's not going to just take it all away. However, I think it was just the solution to this problem. After Gramps started getting sick, I noticed my main focus was drinking. It was partly because I was upset, but partly because I knew that this was something too enjoyed. It was something that allowed me to let go of all the hurt and the upset. And lets face it, I'm probably one of the funniest drunk guys ever. I mean, not to toot my own horn or anything, but it's true.

Well, as the time continued to pass, my craving for the alcohol got a little more than I could handle. I started drinking more and more excessively. Which I thought wasn't anything big, well I didn't really think much at all. I was to busy blacking out, and thinking about the next place I'd get my hands on liquor. Which clearly was not the right way to do things. Then he ended up passing away, it wasn't something I wasn't aware of, but it wasn't something I was ready to let go of so soon. Our time had been precious. I was his favorite grandson, and we shared the common bond, of birthdays. As well, as being the manly-men we are. Those being his exact words. He was always a wise man, I mean yeah he too had his issues with drinking, but it was his thing. He was old and hell if I was old and becoming decrepited you better believe, I'd live it up, and drink myself right under the god damn table.

Well that's when it hit me, I wasn't even getting hang-overs anymore. I would just get up in the morning, and start drinking. My head didn't hurt, and my body didn't hurt. I didn't feel nauseous. I felt shitfaced all over again. It was great. I loved it, or so I thought I did. It was masking the pain that was really under everything. Which was the fact that I'd lost him. I'd lost the one thing, that always made sense in my head. That was him. He was the guy that I told everything too. He was my best friend, my role model. It wasn't until the yacht party that I realized what a good thing I have in front of me. I have a girlfriend, who loves me. She noticed my horrible drinking habit. She stopped me that night, and took me into her arms, and asked me to come back to her. I know I shouldn't have even put her in that position, but it was her that woke me up. She was the one pulling me back to reality.

That's when I turned to Josh too. We talked a little after the party, and he noticed that my drinking was out of control. I mean poor guy seemed to have a few issues of his own, but at the same time. I think it was for the better that he recognized mine. We talked the day after, and decided that it was time for both of us to get the hell out of this place for a bit. We decided a road trip was in order. And we did just that. We peaced out, and headed fishing. I'll admit we got fucking obliterated the first night. After that, we both decided that it was a good idea for us to stay sober for a while. See if we really can live with out alcohol. Me more so than him. I mean lets face it, he wasn't the one drinking every hour of ever day. I'm doing this for me. I'm doing this for the love I have for Abby, and the fact that I can afford to lose her. She's my life. I love her. I mean you can call me sap if you want, but it's still something that's true. So over all, I think I've learned a few valuable lessons, and here's to being sober for a week so far. Not a drop of alcohol in this guy's system!